In Memoriam

I really hate to write these types of posts, but the love I felt for this individual demands it.

The year was 1987.  I was 19 years old, married to my first husband and in "A" school, in the Navy.

The gentleman that is the subject of this post was first my A school instructor, then he was my lover, and friend.

It was one of those unexpected connections.

I honestly had no idea he felt anything for me beyond being a student until the night of the graduation party from A school.

I didn't realize I felt anything for him, either.  Prior to that, I was merely grateful for his help in guiding me to safety after a particularly bad night with my now ex-husband.

You see, one night my husband held a gun to my head all night, and threatened to kill my family.  I knew my brother, who was only 15, was going to be home alone the next day while I was at work, and I was scared out of my mind.

My soul was as battered and bruised as my body.

Wayne took me through the steps to inform the proper authorities and guide me to safety.  With the help of his co-instructor, who remains my friend to this day.

I had a huge fight with my husband about going to the graduation party because he wasn't invited. Once word broke of how he treated me, my fellow classmates were prepared to defend me at all costs.

It was at the party that Wayne and I had our first conversation that ended up with me following him to his apartment and making love with him until the wee hours of the morning.

He was the first man that ever made me feel beautiful.

I left my husband the next day.  I reckon I'm not a cheater, and it was the final sign that my marriage was over.

Our love affair lasted about a year, maybe a year and a half.  He took me home to meet his family once.  They were tickled to death since I was 20 years younger than he was.  His sister laughed right out loud.

And the age difference...my immaturity at that age is what ended things.  It ended as quietly as it started.  We stayed close for a while and then kind of drifted apart.

I called him one time when I lived in Georgia.  He was a little freaked out that I found his phone number on the internet because he was one of those that believed in absolute secrecy and privacy.  I think it must have been right before he died, looking at the time frame.

He always got hurt because nobody looked him up.

He was a Vietnam veteran..prior special forces in the Army before he went Navy.  He only ever told me one story and that secret I will take to my grave.

He was a kind, gentle soul.  I loved him.  I always will.  There's a lot I'm not saying here out of respect for him, his love for me, and his need for privacy.  I cannot, however, let him slip into obscurity unmourned.

Fair winds and following seas.  I will never forget you.  Thank you.  I hope I said that, but I probably didn't.